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 Sexual Urges

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irishrose
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PostSubject: Sexual Urges   Mon May 07, 2007 3:46 pm

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either... but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.

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Loz™

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PostSubject: Re: Sexual Urges   Mon May 07, 2007 4:39 pm

clever stuff i guess Neutral LOL

hard to admit it tho .....
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gb617uk

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PostSubject: Re: Sexual Urges   Mon May 07, 2007 7:32 pm

well there ya go,,a brite guy ,but sexless
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irishrose
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PostSubject: Re: Sexual Urges   Tue May 08, 2007 12:21 am

LMAO

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Cyco



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PostSubject: Re: Sexual Urges   Tue May 08, 2007 6:44 pm

that was good
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gb617uk

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PostSubject: Re: Sexual Urges   Tue May 08, 2007 9:42 pm

i think id keep the sex and let her think i was a dumb fuk ..
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Mavado

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PostSubject: Re: Sexual Urges   Wed May 09, 2007 12:12 am

clever
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irishrose
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PostSubject: Re: Sexual Urges   Wed May 09, 2007 2:32 am

LOL i like this one Very Happy

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Menace
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Registration date : 2007-05-05

PostSubject: Re: Sexual Urges   Wed May 09, 2007 9:49 am

lmfao....i aint buyin a bitch shit


Lol maybe somethin for a few bucks


that bitch got put in her place lol
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